I don't really remember the age that I first heard about abortion. I probably don't remember it because I didn't understand what it was at the time. I do, however, remember the time when I heard about abortion and learned what it is...
I was fourteen at the time, a high school freshman. Our English teacher decided that she was going to pair up the class in twos to have debates on highly controversial topics; topics that you are either for or against, as there are no gray areas. I wasn't given the topic of abortion(I was actually on the pro side of gay rights), but when the time came for us to present our arguments to the class, I couldn't help but be fascinated by the topic of abortion.
I didn't even need to think about it at the time; I already knew which side I was for... Pro-choice. As a woman, I thought, If I ever become pregnant before I'm ready, I will get an abortion... It seems pretty silly now, actually, even though I'm still pro-choice. How did I make up my mind so quickly, when I didn't even have all the facts laid out before me?
Apparently, it didn't matter if I had those facts or not, since I'm still on the same side. Anyway, as I continued through high school and onto college, I looked deeper and deeper into the topic of abortion, listening to both sides and making my own conclusions. I became a huge advocate for pro-choice, finding whatever ways I could to voice my opinion. With the internet, that's very easy to do...or so one would think...
About a year ago, I was sitting around the house, bored and surfing the internet. I got on YouTube and just started watching funny videos. Once I'd spent all the time I cared to on those videos, I decided to take a serious turn. I wonder what the abortion videos on YouTube look like... So, I simply typed in, "Abortion", in the search bar and went to work.
Most of the videos on YouTube that concern abortion are either news casts or pro-life videos. Neither of those were very interesting to me, but I found myself drawn more to the comments section of these videos than the videos themselves. SO many people had such strong opinions on this matter. I was amazed...and happy.
You see, because abortion is such a crucial topic for me, I like to discuss it. I like to go into a debate with an open-mind, genuinely listen to what others have to say about their position. But, in YouTube, it's completely different. I talked for about a month with only one person. How we managed not to get interrupted is beyond me. There were about five people who controlled the conversation on the video we chatted on and they were all very passionate about what they were discussing. I barely paid them any mind, though.
It wasn't until the first month was over that my happiness was shattered. One of the pro-life regulars to the video saw something I had posted that she did not agree with and went totally crazy. She started going through all of the comments on the video, finding mine and replying to all of them. In most, she would call me "baby killer" or "murderer". A lot of the time, she would say that she would be surprised if I was against slitting born babies' throats, which I was appalled at.
That was when I started paying attention to all the other conversations going on. Most of these comments people were writing back and forth to each other couldn't even be considered conversations. Someone would point out a flaw in an opponent's position, but the opponent never challenged them back... Instead, they would just call their adversary names and laugh at whatever side they were on.
I will admit that I got sucked into this for a really long time. About eleven months. I found myself liking the drama, checking my YouTube inbox for new comments every five minutes. I wanted a fight, not a debate anymore. Most of the time, it was just too easy to defeat my opponents, but the strange thing to me was that they never acted like they'd been defeated. For instance, a pro-life person once told me that nothing I said had any credibility because I never backed up my arguments with facts. This, of course, was false. I had many other people - including those who were on the opposite side as me - back me up, telling my opponent that I had backed up most - if not all - of my arguments with facts.
To my awe, this person just continued to insist that I was wrong and that I was only using opinions to prove my points. I called him a hypocrite in return because he was doing exactly what he said I was doing. None of what I said fazed him at all.
So, earlier today, I was on the same exact video site, doing my usual routine of replying to all the people who had commented on something I'd said. I don't know how this next part came to light... I had an epiphany.
None of the people in that video's comment section actually took this debate seriously. If they did, they wouldn't be calling each other: "gay", "homo", "bitch", "baby killer", "woman hater", etc. So I wondered if there was any other forum on the internet I could go to that had people who took the debate seriously. I found one...sort of.
I won't name the site that I found because I do not want to give myself away(I'm pretty sure that if any of the people who were on that site see this, they'll immediately know who I am. BUT...I don't think very many people see this anyway, so I'm alright with putting this out there). I went through a few of the abortion forums on the site and found that most of the people on the site took the debate seriously(a little too seriously sometimes). Then I hatched a plan.
I signed up for the site so I could start a new thread and went to work. In my thread, I told them that I was new to the abortion debate. I said that I had heard of it before, but never really found it interesting and honestly didn't care about it until then. Because so many states have been passing new laws concerning abortion lately, I told them that a new abortion law in my state piqued my interest.
I declared that I wanted each person who posted on the forum to name what side of the abortion debate they were on and their reasons for being on that side. I did not specify that they had to have facts because, a lot of the time, people make up their mind on abortion based on personal opinions, not facts. I told them that I would like it if they could site some sources and make compelling arguments for their side. The result...turning someone who is "on the fence" over to their side of the topic.
Now, if I were on the other side of a post like that, I'd have probably written out a five page paper on why I am pro-choice, if not to gain that person's support when the time to make changes to laws came about, then just to get my opinion out. Unfortunately, these people weren't so excited to talk about WHY they are what they are.
Most people either asked me if I was pregnant or if I was writing a paper for school. I didn't get why they would think that earlier, but now that I think back on it, it makes perfect sense. I am writing a blog about it right now, aren't I? So it was research of a sort.
After I established that I am not pregnant, nor am I writing a paper, most people proceeded to tell me that only I could make that decision, not anyone else. I agree with this, but...really? You have a chance to openly speak your mind about something that you are supposed to be passionate about! You're really going to pass this up?
But that's exactly what they did, each and every one of them.
I love the drama in the YouTube comments sections of abortion videos, but there is no serious debate going on, something that I desperately want. I have some pretty good reasons for why I am pro-choice(something I will probably go into detail about in a later post) and I would like to map those out. I think the only reason why I haven't done it here yet is because I have so few readers.
I love that people can be so open-minded in the forums...but they're a little too open-minded. Yeah, every now and then you'll see two people get in a spat over something one of them said, but that's rare. And, even so, they still don't seem like their very passionate about what they're talking about.
I suppose the best option for me to go with right now is the YouTube comments section. I would rather deal with idiots who are passionate about what they are talking about than a bunch of smarty-pants who, in the end, probably don't care about the end-situation of abortion.
I would just like to know why no one takes this debate seriously anymore. Yes, there are probably a lot more people who can make better debates in real life than on the computer, but I live in such a small town, it isn't even funny. I'd honestly be surprised if anyone outside of my family and my boyfriend's family were pro-choice.
I'd like to end with this little tidbit: if you're ever in the mood for a good spat with someone, just go to YouTube, type in "abortion" in the search bar, and filter the result for the most viewed videos. Those with 1 million or more views are where you will have a good fight, if you can pretend to be passionate about pro-choice or pro-life.
~Oblivious
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